I just love her so much. I think I want Chas to make me a T-Shirt of this.
Monday, September 24, 2007
Seasons Change
Another aspect of BTW for me was bringing things up to the surface which had not been properly addressed.
It's funny, 'cause when you do the kind of work that I do it's easy to get lulled into a sense that you have already worked on all your stuff. Oh sure, I do my cleansing and my introspective work, but sometimes what you really need is a change of scenery to put it all into perspective. And if that scenery is a magically charged space, well... then expect the unexpected.
Those of you who know me socially, as well as those whom I met and saw at BTW, are probably familiar with the fact that I have been seeing/dating Philip (southernpm) (aka "the weekend boyfriend") for some time now. In fact, some of you might be more accustomed to seeing me with him than with my husband Chas (carnivalia) since the two of us rarely leave the house together due to his mother's care needs. Long story short, as Philip and I stepped into the space of BTW it really started to put a magnifying lens on those issues that we needed to look at, the result of which is that we have decided that we make much better friends than we do lovers.
While there is some level of sadness at losing (at least the idea of having) something more, I am really happy to be making the conscious transition into what feels like a much better place for us all. In terms of break-ups, it's one of the very best I've encountered, which is a testament to each of our commitments to honesty, communication, and above all compassion. I'm looking forward to exploring what it means to be his friend, without any of the pressure that had inadvertently built up over our time together. I think we'll make great friends. How do I know this? Because we already are.
I have some other thoughts about some things that occurred for me at BTW that I will likely post more privately soon, but for now I am happy to report that I made some really good connections there that I am truly grateful for.
More later.
It's funny, 'cause when you do the kind of work that I do it's easy to get lulled into a sense that you have already worked on all your stuff. Oh sure, I do my cleansing and my introspective work, but sometimes what you really need is a change of scenery to put it all into perspective. And if that scenery is a magically charged space, well... then expect the unexpected.
Those of you who know me socially, as well as those whom I met and saw at BTW, are probably familiar with the fact that I have been seeing/dating Philip (southernpm) (aka "the weekend boyfriend") for some time now. In fact, some of you might be more accustomed to seeing me with him than with my husband Chas (carnivalia) since the two of us rarely leave the house together due to his mother's care needs. Long story short, as Philip and I stepped into the space of BTW it really started to put a magnifying lens on those issues that we needed to look at, the result of which is that we have decided that we make much better friends than we do lovers.
While there is some level of sadness at losing (at least the idea of having) something more, I am really happy to be making the conscious transition into what feels like a much better place for us all. In terms of break-ups, it's one of the very best I've encountered, which is a testament to each of our commitments to honesty, communication, and above all compassion. I'm looking forward to exploring what it means to be his friend, without any of the pressure that had inadvertently built up over our time together. I think we'll make great friends. How do I know this? Because we already are.
I have some other thoughts about some things that occurred for me at BTW that I will likely post more privately soon, but for now I am happy to report that I made some really good connections there that I am truly grateful for.
More later.
Happy, Happy, Joy, Joy! (and appropriate meditational movements)
Happy Birthday to yezida!!! I hope it's a great one! We need to plan a trip to Death Guild so I can buy you a birthday drink!
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Goodbye Esmeralda...
Alice Ghostley died yesterday. You may remember her from her character of "Esmeralda" on the TV show Bewitched.
I have such a soft-spot for the cast of that show, as they were my first exposure to witchcraft and were directly responsible for me pursuing that path. (When I was two years old I told my mother that I was going to be a witch, and I doubt that it had much to do with the Horned God and the Goddess of the moon at that age!)
Good bye, Alice! You will be missed!
I have such a soft-spot for the cast of that show, as they were my first exposure to witchcraft and were directly responsible for me pursuing that path. (When I was two years old I told my mother that I was going to be a witch, and I doubt that it had much to do with the Horned God and the Goddess of the moon at that age!)
Good bye, Alice! You will be missed!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Feri Camp Extended Deadline!
Crossposted to
Good news! The registration deadline for the upcoming Massachusetts Feri Camp has been extended to September 28th! So if you still want to go, but were worried you couldn't register in time, now is your chance!
New England Feri Intensive
Exploring the Mysteries of Poetry, Madness & Death
With Anaar, Storm Faerywolf, Michele Jackson and Karina
October 4 - 8, 2007
Camp Nawaka, East Otis, MA
Join Feri students, practitioners, initiates and four teachers from distinct lines in the Berkshire Mountains of New England for four nights and five days of intensive classes, ritual, community and magic. We will open to the darker mysteries of Feri Tradition focusing intently on the Mighty Dead, Hoodoo, Psychic Opening and Protection, Danger & Delight, Bardic Circle, the Dark Deities and the turning of the Year Wheel. The Intensive will engage the Whole Self, using a variety of methods including song, poetry, guided meditation, dance, crafts and more.
Please visit http://www.blackheartferi.com/feriintensive.html for more information!
Good news! The registration deadline for the upcoming Massachusetts Feri Camp has been extended to September 28th! So if you still want to go, but were worried you couldn't register in time, now is your chance!
New England Feri Intensive
Exploring the Mysteries of Poetry, Madness & Death
With Anaar, Storm Faerywolf, Michele Jackson and Karina
October 4 - 8, 2007
Camp Nawaka, East Otis, MA
Join Feri students, practitioners, initiates and four teachers from distinct lines in the Berkshire Mountains of New England for four nights and five days of intensive classes, ritual, community and magic. We will open to the darker mysteries of Feri Tradition focusing intently on the Mighty Dead, Hoodoo, Psychic Opening and Protection, Danger & Delight, Bardic Circle, the Dark Deities and the turning of the Year Wheel. The Intensive will engage the Whole Self, using a variety of methods including song, poetry, guided meditation, dance, crafts and more.
Please visit http://www.blackheartferi.com/feriintensive.html for more information!
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Memeage, it's the word!
I have mucho new people on my friend's list! Yay! But for friends new and old, in an effort to get to know you a bit better... why not take time out from your job and waste precious company time by mis-using their internet resources? C'mon... you know you want to.
Stolen shamelessly from queerpaganquill:
Answer in the comments, all comments will be screened.
1. Do you have a tattoo?
2. How old are you?
3. Are you single or taken?
4. Fish?
5. Do you dream in color?
6. Ever seen a corpse?
7. How about them hipsters?
8. How did we meet?
9. What's your philosophy on life and death?
10. If you could do anything with me, and have no one know, what would it be?
11. Do you trust the police?
12. Do you like musicals?
13. What is your fondest memory of me?
14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be?
15. Would you cheat?
16. What are you wearing?
17. Have you ever peed in a pool?
18. Would you hide evidence for me if I asked you to?
19. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together?
20. Which do you prefer - short or long hair?
21. What's your favorite day of the week?
22. What's your favorite color?
23. If you could bring back anyone that has passed, who would it be?
24. Tell me one interesting/odd fact about you?
25. What was your first impression of me?
26. Have you ever done drugs?
27. If we were locked in an elevator together, what would you want to discuss?
28. What is your favorite meal to have when you're on date?
29. If there is any habit you have that you could change - what is it?
Stolen shamelessly from queerpaganquill:
Answer in the comments, all comments will be screened.
1. Do you have a tattoo?
2. How old are you?
3. Are you single or taken?
4. Fish?
5. Do you dream in color?
6. Ever seen a corpse?
7. How about them hipsters?
8. How did we meet?
9. What's your philosophy on life and death?
10. If you could do anything with me, and have no one know, what would it be?
11. Do you trust the police?
12. Do you like musicals?
13. What is your fondest memory of me?
14. If you could change anything about yourself what would it be?
15. Would you cheat?
16. What are you wearing?
17. Have you ever peed in a pool?
18. Would you hide evidence for me if I asked you to?
19. If I only had one day to live, what would we do together?
20. Which do you prefer - short or long hair?
21. What's your favorite day of the week?
22. What's your favorite color?
23. If you could bring back anyone that has passed, who would it be?
24. Tell me one interesting/odd fact about you?
25. What was your first impression of me?
26. Have you ever done drugs?
27. If we were locked in an elevator together, what would you want to discuss?
28. What is your favorite meal to have when you're on date?
29. If there is any habit you have that you could change - what is it?
Happy Birthday!!!
It's time for us all to celebrate that glorious day when the world was gifted with lonespiritwolf2.
Happy Birthday, baby... I'm so glad I got to see you recently. I love you. :)
Happy Birthday, baby... I'm so glad I got to see you recently. I love you. :)
Tuesday, September 18, 2007
Back from Between the Worlds...
I arrived home safe and sound early Monday morning from my week of camping at Between the Worlds in Ohio. I'm still adjusting to "the real world" (whatever that means) but I wanted to take a moment to chronicle my feelings and experiences at the event.
I originally had some feelings of trepidation surrounding my attendance at the event. My experience with large groups of gay men (there were about 90 in attendance) have not exactly been all that kind; usually centered in places of addiction (i.e. bars) or basically focused on inflating some already over-inflated egos to the extent of coldness and cruelty to others. Perhaps I'm naive, but I'm one of those people that feels that people should actually be nice to each other. Or, as carnivalia once put it, "You're one of those who actually believe what they taught you on Sesame Street, aren't you?"
My stress soon melted away as I arrived at the land: 625 acres of reclaimed land that as recent as 20 years ago had been decimated by strip mining. Today it is beautiful; paths and trees, and meadows... simply gorgeous, and a symbol of hope in a world that continues to exploit and destroy our natural places.
Whatever feelings of social anxiety I still had were alleviated as I met the individuals involved in the event; so caring and genuine. They put me at ease with their compassion, their laughter, and their fierce commitment to building a healthy intentional community. Never before have I experienced such a sense of profound love and acceptance, so much so that I was, at times, overwhelmed. My only other experiences with Pagan retreats have been the two Feri Camps that I have taught at, and one Feri Initiates gathering and while I found them all to be very powerful, transformative, and full of connection, it was BTW that spoke most directly to my heart and soul. I have felt that certain individuals in the Feri community have been my "family". At this little temporary mystical village in Ohio, I felt a profound sense of familiarity even though I had not met most of them before; as if I were truly "coming home" to a family that I had not even known that I had forgotten.
One lesson that I learned was just how much of my power leaks away by living in a straight society. When I go to the grocery store, or walk down the street, I do not feel comfortable showing any level of affection for my husband or lovers unless I am in a queer specific place or a private setting amongst friends. It's an issue of safety, as I have been in situations in which I have been attacked and threatened for my sexuality. Until I got to BTW I had no idea how much of my attention and power is devoted to not showing public affection or being too "animated". It was an important lesson for me to experience, and I am working on incorporating this insight into my current practice.
There were a lot of inspirational experiences at this event. Between the workshops, rituals, intense conversations, and even a surprise heart-connection that swept me off my feet, I feel invigorated to take my practice in a new direction. Certainly one of the very first things I will be doing is returning to the book I have been writing about Witchcraft for Gay men.
I had an opportunity to teach a workshop ("The Amethyst Pentacle") which ended-up beginning with a little introduction to the Feri tradition. I received some good feedback and am honored and touched that so many people seemed to have gotten something positive out of it. The rest of the time I was simply attending other's workshops and basically "smoozing" which allowed me to meet and get to know some amazing people.
I had an opportunity to hang out with Christopher Penczak (torcboy) and his husband Steve Kenson (xomec). They are both really down-to-earth and talented people. (And very geekish, which of course is sexy to me.) ;)
I also got to meet Doug and Joe from Otherworld Apothecary. They are both initiates in a branch of pre-Wiccan traditional witchcraft, and are ecologists to boot. I took their class on Land Based Craft which really opened up some stuff for me (and truth be told, kinda scared me a little, which to those of you who really know me will know that I then found it potent and cool!) I found their overall approach to be "very Feri" in places, or at least in what I was taught (as opposed to a lot of the public Feri stuff which has incorporated elements of Wicca and Ceremonial magick.) If you get a chance, go to their website. They not only have the finest quality traditional magical oil and herbal blends that I have found, but their bottles and labels are both beautiful and exquisite. Chas and I will be carrying as much of their products as we can after we take over Dolphin Dream in November.
The musical guest was Jeffrey Altergott, and if you are not familiar with his work then you owe it to yourself to check him out. His presence was soft, warm, and his talent is considerable. I didn't get much of a chance to speak with him, but I am hoping to remedy that next year. And I just saw that he friended me here on LiveJournal! Yay!
The keynote speaker was Sparky T. Rabbit. This was of particular importance to me, as it was his work with the Pagan band Lunacy that really paved the way for me to embrace a Queer Pagan path back when I was just a witchling. I made the point of letting him know, since I think it's very important to honor our elders, as they have provided the foundation for us to live and practice as we do.
There were so many more that made this event such a magical one and I would be hard-pressed to mention them all. Many thanks to lonespiritwolf2 and to technocowboy who have been trying to get me to this event for the past several years. I will indeed be going back and am already making my list of what offerings I'd like to present.
Now, I am getting ready for the next . I leave in two weeks for Massachusetts. I'm really looking forward to it. I even have a few new techniques to incorporate into my offerings there. It is promising to be a powerful event.
I originally had some feelings of trepidation surrounding my attendance at the event. My experience with large groups of gay men (there were about 90 in attendance) have not exactly been all that kind; usually centered in places of addiction (i.e. bars) or basically focused on inflating some already over-inflated egos to the extent of coldness and cruelty to others. Perhaps I'm naive, but I'm one of those people that feels that people should actually be nice to each other. Or, as carnivalia once put it, "You're one of those who actually believe what they taught you on Sesame Street, aren't you?"
My stress soon melted away as I arrived at the land: 625 acres of reclaimed land that as recent as 20 years ago had been decimated by strip mining. Today it is beautiful; paths and trees, and meadows... simply gorgeous, and a symbol of hope in a world that continues to exploit and destroy our natural places.
Whatever feelings of social anxiety I still had were alleviated as I met the individuals involved in the event; so caring and genuine. They put me at ease with their compassion, their laughter, and their fierce commitment to building a healthy intentional community. Never before have I experienced such a sense of profound love and acceptance, so much so that I was, at times, overwhelmed. My only other experiences with Pagan retreats have been the two Feri Camps that I have taught at, and one Feri Initiates gathering and while I found them all to be very powerful, transformative, and full of connection, it was BTW that spoke most directly to my heart and soul. I have felt that certain individuals in the Feri community have been my "family". At this little temporary mystical village in Ohio, I felt a profound sense of familiarity even though I had not met most of them before; as if I were truly "coming home" to a family that I had not even known that I had forgotten.
One lesson that I learned was just how much of my power leaks away by living in a straight society. When I go to the grocery store, or walk down the street, I do not feel comfortable showing any level of affection for my husband or lovers unless I am in a queer specific place or a private setting amongst friends. It's an issue of safety, as I have been in situations in which I have been attacked and threatened for my sexuality. Until I got to BTW I had no idea how much of my attention and power is devoted to not showing public affection or being too "animated". It was an important lesson for me to experience, and I am working on incorporating this insight into my current practice.
There were a lot of inspirational experiences at this event. Between the workshops, rituals, intense conversations, and even a surprise heart-connection that swept me off my feet, I feel invigorated to take my practice in a new direction. Certainly one of the very first things I will be doing is returning to the book I have been writing about Witchcraft for Gay men.
I had an opportunity to teach a workshop ("The Amethyst Pentacle") which ended-up beginning with a little introduction to the Feri tradition. I received some good feedback and am honored and touched that so many people seemed to have gotten something positive out of it. The rest of the time I was simply attending other's workshops and basically "smoozing" which allowed me to meet and get to know some amazing people.
I had an opportunity to hang out with Christopher Penczak (torcboy) and his husband Steve Kenson (xomec). They are both really down-to-earth and talented people. (And very geekish, which of course is sexy to me.) ;)
I also got to meet Doug and Joe from Otherworld Apothecary. They are both initiates in a branch of pre-Wiccan traditional witchcraft, and are ecologists to boot. I took their class on Land Based Craft which really opened up some stuff for me (and truth be told, kinda scared me a little, which to those of you who really know me will know that I then found it potent and cool!) I found their overall approach to be "very Feri" in places, or at least in what I was taught (as opposed to a lot of the public Feri stuff which has incorporated elements of Wicca and Ceremonial magick.) If you get a chance, go to their website. They not only have the finest quality traditional magical oil and herbal blends that I have found, but their bottles and labels are both beautiful and exquisite. Chas and I will be carrying as much of their products as we can after we take over Dolphin Dream in November.
The musical guest was Jeffrey Altergott, and if you are not familiar with his work then you owe it to yourself to check him out. His presence was soft, warm, and his talent is considerable. I didn't get much of a chance to speak with him, but I am hoping to remedy that next year. And I just saw that he friended me here on LiveJournal! Yay!
The keynote speaker was Sparky T. Rabbit. This was of particular importance to me, as it was his work with the Pagan band Lunacy that really paved the way for me to embrace a Queer Pagan path back when I was just a witchling. I made the point of letting him know, since I think it's very important to honor our elders, as they have provided the foundation for us to live and practice as we do.
There were so many more that made this event such a magical one and I would be hard-pressed to mention them all. Many thanks to lonespiritwolf2 and to technocowboy who have been trying to get me to this event for the past several years. I will indeed be going back and am already making my list of what offerings I'd like to present.
Now, I am getting ready for the next . I leave in two weeks for Massachusetts. I'm really looking forward to it. I even have a few new techniques to incorporate into my offerings there. It is promising to be a powerful event.
Wednesday, September 05, 2007
Tuesday, September 04, 2007
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