Not out of the woods yet...

Well... we just found out yesterday that Patt's sore leg is the result of an extensive and life threatening blood-clot. We had to take her from her doctor's appointment right over to the emergency room so that they could evaulate her. Normally they give blood thinners for that, but becasue of her brain condition they didn't want to to that... so they opted to perform a surgery to place a filter in the vein to prevent it from migrating up and into her lungs... although they found that it had already begun doing exactly that and that part of it was already there. It must have just happened because she didn't have any pain in her chest until after we got to the emergency room! Because of the extensiveness they finally decided to go ahead with both the thinners and the surgery. I'm sittiing at home right now waiting to hear back... they performed the surgery earlier and I have no clue how it went. They said it would only take a half an hour, but you know how that goes...

Healing prayers and energy is requested...

A New Year...

Well, my husband Chas and myself have been caring for his ailing mother. I quit my job of 9 years back in April so that someone could stay home with her, as she could only afford to pay someone for a short time before having to sell everything she's ever owned just for the privilage of having someone she doesn't know care for her basic needs. As time has gone on, we have realized that she's probably not going to get any better... her 6 brain surgeries that she endured last year have left her confused and physically incapable. We have also realized that it really takes two people to care for her... one to do the work, and one 'just in case'. Walking is major trouble for her and she has fallen before... One person assisting her can pretty much only slow the fall... once she's on the ground it takes two people to get her back up. One day I had to call Chas to come home early so that he could help me lift her. It's a 45 minute drive, so I just had to sit with her and make her comfortable until he arrived. It's not something that any of us wish to go through again.

In other news, Chas' work has been really bad for him. He works for a large health food store chain, and as the economy has been getting worse, so have the treatment of the employees. I suppose that's par for the course, but we really expected more out of them with all of their talk about caring for their employees. Chas has had to take time off of work in order to deal with his mom's afairs... between the surgeries, the follow-up visits, the moving details, the banking, etc... and his work is not too pleased. But what can we do about it?

Chas and I have decided that it is perhaps time to live one of our dreams. We have always wanted to start our own business, selling our art. So, towards that end, he is taking a leave of absence from his work in a little over a week, and we are going to start the process of setting-up a home business. It's scary, but oh so time. I am hoping that between his art and my own, that we can make enough to pay the bills. I'm just begining to see *some* activity in my online store, and so I am encouraged that after awhile it may catch on. Chas does sculptures in various themes, and has been experimenting with making molds so that he can produce product on a larger scale. We have had some success selling his work on eBay before.

The name that we have chosen is "Carnivalia" to reflect the celebratory theme that runs through a lot of our shared work. I just purchased the domain name and am looking forward to having another web-project to keep me busy. ;)

UPDATE: Check out his website at Carnivalia.com.

I'm very excited that we are taking this next step. Hopfully it will prove a healthy thing for us.

So... please keep us in your prayers and thoughts. We could use some encouraging energy right about now as we jump into the Void...

Look out below!

In Celebration of the Solstice!

Merry Yule! I am pleased to announce that in celebration of the Winter Solstice I have released my very first book!

The Stars Within the Earth is a collection of my poetry, along with some spells and invocations inspired by my work in the F(a)eri(e) tradition of Witchcraft. I have been wokring on it for awhile, and am very excited to be able to offer it now. Paperback. 106 pages. It is available for $16.95 from my online store.

Future projects include a book on Witchcraft for gay men, and various meditation/trance journey CD's. I'm keeping busy, busy, busy...

I hope that everyone has a wonderful Holiday!

Many Blessings!

Lay my burden down...

I am so happy... so very happy... that I have left some of the email communities that I was a part of.

I've been perplexed... and angry... and hurt... and tired... so very tired... of having to put up with what I see as illness. Ego-driven illness. Perhaps there were more elegant ways that I could have handled myself, but I'm not really sure what they were. And as they say, done is done. Lines have been drawn, and all of that base human nonsense, and you know what? I think it's a good thing. In the long-run I think things will be the better for it. There is a time and a place for anger... when there is injustice, anger assists us. It can be a compass, telling us where to direct our power. In the end it told me to direct mine elsewhere.

So now I find myself able to write again. And work on my art. That is what is most important to me...

So the work on the book is moving right along. I feel it would have been finished by now, had this whole thing not happened, but oh well... I learned a lot in the process.

I laughed, I cried, it became a part of me. Pass the popcorn.

Creative drudgery...

Today I am having some trouble focusing... We took Chas' mom to her Dr.'s appointment today... so I had this event in the middle of my day... not entirely creativly inspiring.

Now I am trying to write, write, write... but you can't force poetry, dammit! ;-)

Speaking of... here's a little one:

Holy Satyr

Holy Satyr!
I invite your lust.
Horned Lord!
There is fire in your touch.
Wild God!
Ravage me and take your pleasure
Between the worlds I call your name:
Pan! Pan! Pan!
Io Evohe! Blessed be.

©2003

Moving right along...

Well, I'm new to all of the blog stuff, so we'll just see where this leads.

In the wake of some personal nastiness that I have been going through, I find myself gearing my personal practice toward transmuting emotions like anger and rage into a pure form, and using the raw energy to fuel one of my many art projects. "The Stars within the Earth" is a book of my poetry that I plan on self-publishing within the next month or two. It will be available on my shop, at http://stores.ebay.com/Faerywolf

I'm also working on a book for gay men in the Craft. So far it looks wildly different than any other book out there, so here's keeping my fingers crossed.

Other than that I am just doing what I can to stay centered.